Sunday, August 30, 2009

Teenage Years

Well I am no longer a teenager. I have been think about this for about the past month and a half. I even made a list of 20 things I wanted to do before I turned 20, and I did practically all of them. The only one I didn't do was go skydiving or in a hot air balloon ride. Anyways, I was thinking if I enjoyed my teenage years, and I came to the conclusion that even though there were many times where I made mistakes, and did things that I definitely regret, I loved it! I don't think I would take any of it back. I had soo much fun and I know that it is only the snobby, stupid girls who say that they loved high school, but I did. I moved right in the middle of it and I still loved it. I'm not saying it wasn't challenging, depressing at times, and even lonely, but through it all four years I learned so much and met so many wonderful people who helped me grow and become the person I am today.
I read a really really good book the past two days. It is called Something Borrowed by Emily Giffin. It just makes me want to fall in love again even more. I have been a man hater for long enough. haha! I should not have dwell on one douche bag for so long. They can't all be that way right? Well turns out the next guy I dated was kind of a d-bag too. But then I have to think to myself, do I look for the douches? Do i attract womanizers?! What the heck? Thank you mother for my large breasts! I'm just kidding. These questions just give me even more reason to do some soul searching and trying to find myself, so that I can become the person that I would want to be with.
Well overall I had a really good birthday! I received an amazing phone call from a couple of my favorite boys! They sang a very beautiful birthday song to me. I miss them soo much! Especially one of them ;)

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Tired..

So I've decided that I am tired of being single, I am tired of being uncomfortable with my body, I am tired of being around my parents practically 24/7 on vacation, I am tired of having chapped lips, I am tired of going to school, and having homework. I am also already tired of my best friend being gone.
I talked to a boy tonight for an hour and a half. I may or may not be a little in love with him. I'm very very tired of my brother too! He's sooo stupid! He joins the football team because he actually wanted to, goes through 2 weeks of two-a-days, and then he gets kicked off the team. Hmmm that doesn't make a whole ton of sense to me.
Well I did see baby dolphins today! That was sooo exciting and a little scary at the same time. I was literally within 15 feet of them! Here is a list of cool/scary/fun things that have happened this past week: I committed my first murder (It was an opossum), I got shanked (by scissors that fell on me), I went crab hunting at night, I let a school of fish feast on my feet, I got sunburnt, and I saw baby dolphins! Thats a lot huh?! And on top of that, I am turning 20 in 1 day!
Speaking of turning 20, I wonder if either of my ex boyfriends will call. Guy, the boy I dated for almost 2 years, on and off, I called for his birthday in March and that was the last time we spoke. And my next boyfriend, Kenny... well I kind of hope he doesn't call. I may or may not hate him. No, I don't hate him, I just don't like him at all. I really would rather not hear from him. I guess time will tell.
p.s. I am just plain old tired. Goodnight moon!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

First Blog

Hey anyone who reads these. I have no idea how to blog or what even to write about. I'm not a very good writer either :/ but I would like to get my thoughts out on paper, or blog I guess. Another reason for this is that my best friend is going to a foreign country and won't have anyway of speaking to me other than email and blog. So I think it's necessary that I have a blog too.
Well here is my life at this very moment: I am turning 20 in 2 days! I am kind of obsessed with the song What if you by Joshua Radin and being slightly sun burnt. The latter is pretty bad especially since I am a redhead. Oh well! I am currently in Florida, at Rosemary Beach, where I wouldn't mind spending my honeymoon. I love the tv series Royal Pains. The main doctor is soooo hott! I took a sample GMAT just because yesterday. I think I want to get my MBA at University of Michigan or University of Chicago. But, I have a while to figure all of that out. I just finished watching the movie Catch and Release, and what I got out of it was just another verification that things do happen for a reason. Good or bad, they happen. Sometimes it is just so that we can experience them and learn something, even if it is little. Other times it is so we could meet someone, and hear what they have to say. And sometimes it is not even for us, sometimes it is for someone else. Sometimes someone out there needs to meet you and hear something that you have to say, or just see your smile. Hmm that was a pretty long sidetrack.
I have a small confession. I am very afraid for this next semester of school. This is going to sound bad, but I am moving into a much smaller room and I am pretty upset about it. I liked having a lot of space. Now I am practically moving into a closet. I'll just have to deal as best I can. I am also afraid because I only know one of my roommates. And I barely even know her. I know she is a nice girl, and we will get along just fine but it is going to be a different environment for sure. I'm going to miss my best friend...
Here is another confession. Is it bad if I never want any of my ex's moving on? Can they just permanently be in love with me forever? I know it is not fair at all but it hurts a little bit to see someone you were once so happy with, happy with someone else. I guess I just need to get over it and find myself a little more and become happier with myself. I think it would also help if I had a little bit more closure on some of my breakups. One of them specifically, maybe two. I'm not saying that I ever want to be with ANY of my ex's EVER again either. We all broke up for a reason, and I'm glad that I got to experience every single one of them because I learned something from each. I realized that there are so many characteristics that I want and definitely don't want in my future companion. I realized that there is someone out there who is going to love me for who I am and never want to let me go. Like another song I am obsessed with says, "the guy that says goodbye to you is out of his mind." I know that there will be a man that feels that way about me someday.
If this blog is boring to you, just stop reading it. This is more for me than anyone else on this earth.
What is up with twitter? All of a sudden I keep hearing about it. Do I need to make a twitter? I mean, why do we have all these websites that we have to update? I remember when I was in middle school xanga was the thing to do! And then myspace was all the rave the first couple years of high school. Then facebook was a must! Even my parents have a facebook, which I think they update more than I update mine. I personally think that is a little weird. Now there is this foreign site called Twitter, and when you get on it you are "Tweeting". It makes me laugh a little! Welp, I should probably end this post because I would like to wake up in a few hours, at sunrise to see if I can spot a few dolphins! Wish me luck!